Showing our Writing Process - Write Draft / Edit and Polish / Publish
Written Language - Cameo
Learning Intention: I am learning how to use appropriate and effective similes in my cameo writing.
Success Criteria:
I am able to find and highlight similes in a cameo and explain why they work.
I am able to write appropriate similes for objects in my cameo.
Here is an example:
WINTER
Winter blows its cold breath everywhere.
The early morning frost greets you like being welcomed onto the marae.
The wind howls in the freezing air like a stray dog hungry for a bone.
Snowflakes flutter like leaves falling from autumn trees, covering the ground with a white sparkling blanket.
The trees become bare, brown bones standing like statues admiring the view.
Heavy rain falls from the sky like a thousand hooves pounding against the ground.
Chilly bitterness in the air, winter is here.
Here is my draft piece of writing!
Autumn
Lots of little spider eggs in the lush green sparkly grass as you dunk your cold feet in the lush green grass.
The colourful leaves twirl down off the bold baer trees like pretty ballet twirling around on the stage.
Trees go as bald as a man's bald head.
Trees twist around in the cold wind as the leaves sway like a swing.
The autumn brezze greets you with a shiver from your teeth.
The colourful leaves cover the ground like a nice warm blanket.
The leaves make lots of patina on the ground like rainbows.
In the morninng The sparkly lush green grass sparkles like the stars and when you pounces on them they dissaper like magic!
The leaves skater on the ground and get swoped away by the wind like dead flies.
The trees go bald as the leaves scoop off, and the trees have no pretty hair.
All the colourful leaves change colour and fly off the trees and die.
The leaves crunch like dilousos golden crunchie bars.
Here is my published piece of writing.
Autumn
Lots of little spider eggs lie in the lush green sparkly grass.
The colourful leaves twirl down off the bald trees like pretty ballerina’s twirling around on the stage.
Trees go as bald as a man's bald head.
Tree’s branches swing around in the cold wind.
The autumn breeze greets you with a shiver and goosebumps.
The colourful leaves cover the ground like a nice warm blanket.
The leaves make lots of patterns on the ground like a checkered shirt.
In the morning the sparkly, lush, green grass sparkles like the stars.
The leaves scatter on the ground and get swept away by the wind.
All the colourful leaves change colour and fly off the trees and die.
The leaves crunch like delicious, golden crunchie bars.
